Sometimes inspiration comes from the weirdest places. With the Trevor project it was inspired to prevent teen suicides of teens dealing with bullying. I know that bullying can affect someone long after those hurtful words are said, long after the person who said them is dead and gone.
I personally struggle with words said to me by my father over 20 years ago. In many ways I’m exactly like him and in other distinct ways I’ve made the conscious choice to do the exact opposite of what he would do. As a result I’m a perfectionist who dreams big, plans big, sets up big fail safe plans. And uses someone else’s hard work ethic for physical labor to implement it.
I am very thankful my husband has my fathers work ethic for hard labor because I prefer to work hard with my mind than my body. I’ve become out of shape and disabled due to nurturing those strengths and ignoring my weakness. You give me something technical or logical to figure out and I’m usually the first with a working plan for a solution, and in the case of working on computers by hand I normally fix it myself. I’ve done my own patch panels, crawled around on floors and built RJ-45 jacks, designed large networks from the ground up with no documentation or notes except in my own head. I’m learning now as I return to school I practiced no separation of duties nor have I ever properly documented anything for the IT staff to come behind me.
I look to change that professionally should I ever return to the workforce in the same administrative level I once had. I’ve found Microsoft OneNote and oneDrive to be amazing in allowing me to have notebooks synced on the cloud. Detailed notes on everything I handle and cover. From household expenses, repairs of the car, parts purchased etc I now document everything. It only took 4 years of practice, a lot of passion and an amazing product!
Kisses are blessings you offer your lover. Wherever you place your mouth on your partner’s body, your love consecrates that space and your breath blesses the flesh…You gotta dance like no one’s looking and love like you’ve never been hurt.” We’re really not that different…. me and you. “If blondes are angels fallen from heaven, then I’m the devil that’s risen from below, now who would you rather play with?
Well, this guy Acethy from AOL who I’ve been talking to for over a year, Who’s followed me through my many screen names and has become very persistent to meet me, finally called and I met him today around 4:00. He came over to my house, and when I first answered the door, I was like “I know you” turns out him and I went to high school together and he knew I was gay (duh, everyone did) but I didn’t know he was gay. Anyways it was instant love. I think the best way to describe it was falling in love with a Beautiful stranger. Since the folks were home, we quickly disappeared up to my bedroom and made some small talk. Up until I met Kieth I was always a bottom because I just couldn’t get off as a top, I could get hard, just couldn’t finish off. And he asked me if I was a top, and I told him the truth, so he told me that I’m still a virgin. He sat on my bed, and I sat at my desk playing games on the computer while we talked. We talked about the computer. About how he had a relationship with this guy Victor for 4 years. Before he moved out when he turned 18 to live with this guy in West Chicago. Told me where he used to work. He had a girlfriend for a couple months, they were engaged to be married but he found out she cheated on him and was willing to give her another chance but she called it off. So he figured it would be better that way since he was starting to figure out he’s gay. I went and sat next to him on the bed, and asked him if he was a top, he said no, he likes being a bottom. And I groaned and thought to myself “Oh Shit” And told him “What are we going to do in bed? decorate!” he laughed and said “Well you should know as well as me it just feels better that way” I agreed, then there was the unpleasant silence, neither of us knowing what to say, So I leaned over and kissed him and put one hand behind his head, and the other on his chest. He responded, kissed me back, and laid me down, and laid on top if me and started kissing me passionately and started kissing my neck and ears. He took his shirt off, and I started rubbing his back as he sucked on my neck. Then he took my shirt off, and started kissing his way down my chest, and he unbuttoned my pants and started sucking on my already hard cock. Never in my life have I ever had a blowjob so good in my life, then again, I haven’t been around that long. It was so good I almost came in his mouth instantly. He then got off me, and pulled my pants off, and then took his pants off, but left his underwear on. He got back on me and started kissing me again, this time as he kissed me, he did it so well, and with so much passion, I couldn’t help but rip his underwear off. He looked at me and laughed, and asked me if I wanted to fuck him. I looked down at his hard cock and told him with a dick that big, it would be such a waste to be a bottom, so he rolled me over and fucked me bareback. It hurt at first because it was so large. I just bit my lip, spread my ass and told him to drive it home. And that’s exactly what he did, he fucked me like he had never fucked anyone before in his life… fast and steady, never slowing down. Then finally his breaths were getting shorter and he started fucking harder and harder, finally he drove it in one last time and shot his load in me, and it was a lot of cum, he knew if he pulled out right away with his dick hard there would be a vacuum and his cum would be everywhere, and I told him I wanted him in me as long as possible, So he reached and grabbed the blanket off the floor and covered us both up, wrapped his arms around me and started kissing my neck again. He told me he only cums in people that he loves. I felt honored. I told him that I’m falling in love with him to. We cuddled like that for about an hour. Then he said he had to get home quick or his sister would lock him out of the house, So we both got dressed quickly, and I gave him a pair of tiger print gray satin bikini briefs to wear. We ran down stairs and I got the car key’s and drove him home with my learner’s permit. Before he got out of the car, he told me he loved me, and wanted to see me some more. I said that would be great. As I drove home I was hoping that this wouldn’t be a one night stand.
Testing the mobile app 5/31/2014
It seems every year with the “long nights” in the Winter, I end up doing the most major updates to my sites, such as changing the theme, or even changing the provider. If you’re reading this post. You are reading the newest version of my website now hosted at GoDaddy.com I have left Dreamhost behind, and find them to be bullshit and not worth my time. They charge 9.95 a month for outsourced india tech support, otherwise you’re on your own.
In the 33 years I’ve lived in Joliet, IL I never in my life thought I would walk into a Joliet City Council meeting, and everyone there would know who I am! Yesterday May 6th 2013 was the special ceremony to swear in James McFarland for Joliet City Council. He has pushed for changing Joliet for a very long time, and while some people do feel he’s two faced, He is a politician after all and this just goes with the territory of not being able to please all the people all the time.
Picture it, Chicago 2004 in a bar called Roscoes, a cabaret diva by the name of Amy Armstrong accompanied by Freddy Allen is on stage playing the piano. The bar air is thick with smoke, and all my friends are there to meet me. The week prior I just had to admit my mom into the hospital where she was with ICU at that time and the outlook didn’t look good. Walking into the bar that evening I got a phone call from someone telling me that they wouldn’t be able to come help me sort the baggage out because they had their own baggage, just finding out that they had HIV.
So here I am August 10th, Sitting at Union Station in Chicago getting ready to depart for Washington DC for 10 days. I’m very excited for my vacation. I was dropped off 6 hours early by my very eager to get rid of me husband. I’m not happy about that as he doesn’t seem to love me at all. My room mate and I don’t see eye to eye on much of anything, So I’m pretty sure we won’t be living together much longer. We’re best friends, but living together just doesn’t seem like an option. I got to help a couple Japanese girls use a phone in America for the first time, the payphone wouldn’t work, So I handed them my iPhone. The number their supposed ride gave them doesn’t seem to work and I feel bad for them being abandoned here in America by someone. I told them they could download Skype on their phone and use Skype over Wifi to call their friend since they needed to find another method of contact. I do feel genuinely bad for them. Ahh well. Only 4 more hours until I board my train! I’ll go outside and chain smoke since I got a bit of a surface charge on my devices. On the bright side right after I hit publish, the girls came over to ask me a question to translate the sentence for them, and their friend called back. I guess it was the right number after all.
If I ever did anything right on time, my personal friends would be shocked. I promised a post on June 1st and here I am, 11 days late! Being in Chicago has been an adventure to say the least. I have an app that tells me how much I should be eating, I ignore it most days which is counter productive. As of right now I haven’t even started doing P90x because my endurance sucks. I’ve started with walking every single day of my life. I don’t have a choice, I live in Chicago if I want to go anywhere, I have to walk, and walk a lot! I get in 2-3 miles a day, without even trying, most of it, is walking from one coffee house to another while I search for a job in the city that’s full time. I’ve found a part time job teaching people how to use a computer, and how to build a computer but it’s only 8-12 hours a week depending on the class load that week. If at least 3 people don’t sign up and pay for a class, I don’t work that day, and get told to go home
None the less it’s been a pretty slow start, but an amazingly fun start to say the least.
As I sit here, on the eve of the last day of ever living in Joliet ever again, I am reminded of the 33 years of pure hell this city has given me, by bullying me, and telling me not only what I should do in my bedroom, but my own house. While I don’t have many good memories of this city, I do have good memories of some of the angels who have come to my rescue when I was down. Some have been mentioned on this blog before, some have not. I have already thanked them on my personal Facebook page for everything they have meant to me in my life.
But I will take the opportunity again to thank my husband. He’s proven to me I didn’t have to travel the universe to find the one, I just had to look in my back yard. But I did have to travel the country to fight for love.